BryanBishop.com

SniffTrax #1: The Human Centipede - Dec. 9

2011-12-05T23:06:00.001-08:00

The Film Vault's first feature commentary - cleverly called SniffTrax - is available for download on December 9th. The movie: "The Human Centipede." Here's a preview clip...

SniffTrax #1 preview

The Film Vault returns Sept. 16!

2011-09-06T23:14:00.000-07:00

Same show... new logo!

The Film Vault is back, starting Friday, September 16. Very little is changing - the shows will be released the same day as before (Fridays), you won't have to change your iTunes subscription... really, the only thing new is our fancy new logo:

(Thanks to Zen Rankin for the sweet new design)

Check out our new website for updates (www.AndersonAndBryan.com) and download the preview episode - the never-before-heard "2010 Vaulties."

Top 5 Beatles

2011-08-28T22:11:00.000-07:00

...according to hipsters:

5. Paul McCartney
4. John Lennon
3. Ringo Starr
2. Stuart Sutcliffe/Pete Best (tie)
1. George Harrison

Live From Ontario...

2011-08-16T09:56:00.001-07:00

... you get it.

We'll be doing a live podcast tonight at the Ontario Improv. Get your tickets HERE.

Live from Palm Springs...

2011-07-07T09:52:00.000-07:00

...it's us!

We're all going to be at the Ace Hotel in Palm Springs for a live podcast on Thursday, July 21, at 8pm. Over/under for the outside temperature at showtime is 112 degrees.

Get your tickets here.

Live from New York...

2011-06-12T22:22:00.000-07:00

...it's us!

The Adam Carolla Show is doing two live podcasts from Caroline's Comedy Club in New York City on June 22nd & 23rd.

Get all the details (and tickets) here. See you there!

Twitter Lists

2011-06-01T15:28:00.000-07:00

Twitter lists are a great way to see what people really think of you. Twitter helpfully shows you the lists people put you on. Most are flattering. A few... aren't. Here are some noteworthy lists that my Twitter followers have added me to (my thoughts are in italics):

- Ace Minions (A minion is a "fawning servant." OK, that one's fair)

- To read during refractory period (yikes! hopefully he's reading my Tweets every night, if you

know what I mean)

- Pupetty Oddballs (should I be more upset at "pupetty" or "oddball?")

- People More Important Than Me (you're god damned right)

- Poker (what could I have possibly done or said to make him associate me with poker?)

- I Know You from Somewhere (your dreams?)

- Incense Charcoal Fire & Prayers for Haitians (both of these lists are by the same person BTW)

- Ridiculous Celebrities (this list has the description: "We don't necessarily admire these folks")

- Random Cool as Fuck Cats (again, correct)

What Do These Songs Have in Common?

2011-05-09T18:41:00.000-07:00

The following songs have one very specific thing in common. What is it? (Hint: It was apparently a very popular music trend in the late-80s and early-90s)

Janet Jackson - "Black Cat"

Motley Crue - "Dr. Feelgood"

Def Leppard - "Rocket"

Guns N' Roses - "So Fine"

Poison - "Nothin' But a Good Time"

KISS - "I Stole Your Love"

The Darkness - "I Believe In A Thing Called Love"

Aerosmith - "What It Takes"

It's Not You... Wait, It Totally Is

2011-04-30T18:47:00.000-07:00

A hilarious practice in Hollywood is to replace a principal actor in the sequel to a very successful movie. Nothing else changes about the franchise: Same cast, same director, same everything... except you. I imagine this must be a semi-devastating phone call to receive from your agent when you're an A-List Hollywood star. "Um, they're making a few changes for the sequel.... Yeah, I know the first one made 600 million dollars... what are the changes? Well, actually, it's just one change."

A few notable incidents of a well-known costar getting abruptly replaced in the sequel:

Terrence Howard (by Don Cheadle) in "Iron Man 2" - I never heard an explanation why Terry was let go. Let's just assume he was a delight to work with.

Bill Murray (by Bernie Mac) in "Charlie's Angels 2" - Maybe they scraped the "ill" and "urray" off the Star Wagons trailer and said "Screw it, call Bernie Mac and Brian McKnight and see who will do it cheaper."

Katie Holmes (by Maggie Gylenhaal) in "The Dark Knight" - You could have replaced Katie Holmes with Anna Nicole Smith's corpse and it would have been a lateral move.

Things I Learned From Snooki

2011-02-10T21:08:00.000-08:00

"Old people, they lose their sex life, and that's not a fun time. That's why people always get divorced."

"You know what's fun? Taking a shot off your wife."

"That's why the water is salty. Because of whale sperm."

"The hallway is really small and the bed is, like, really wide. It's kind of like an analogy of Vinny's penis not fitting in my pinhole."

"The lesbian rate in this country is going up."

"You usually don't have sex with your big brother."

"I will pee in a bush, I will poop in a bush, and I will hide in a bush."

"When I told you that I had feelings for you, and then you go and smush my best friend... that's not OK."

"If you wanna make out with me, just ask. I will say yes."

"Word of the day: Sympathetic. It's a big word."

#ThingsILearnedFromSnooki

Who To Root For?

2011-01-29T22:43:00.000-08:00

If you're lucky enough to be a fan of one of the two teams playing in the Super Bowl, you know exactly who to root for: your own team. If, like me, you're a fan of one of the other 30 teams, you might need some help choosing which team to root for. Because any moron can root for the best team.

1. Your home team. In my case, the 49ers. Which means I started assembling this list in Week 4.

2. A team you have a personal connection to. Does a high school classmate play quarterback for the New England Patriots? (In my case, yes) Is your step-cousin the long-snapper for the Bears? Is your aunt a massage therapist for the Jets? If so, make sure she puts you in her will, because that woman's about to be RICH!

3. The team your dad roots for (if different than #1). Despite spending his entire life in the San Francisco Bay Area, my dad is a huge Miami Dolphins fan. Why? He graduated high school in 1972; the Dolphins went undefeated in '72. You do the frontrunning-math. That said, if the Dolphins ever made the Super Bowl again (ha! sorry, Dad), I'd root for them.

4. The team with the most prominent alumni from your college. I went to USC. I like to see former Trojans do well in the NFL. Therefore, I must root for the Pittsburgh Steelers (Troy Polamalu) first and the Green Bay Packers (Clay Matthews) second. UNLESS one of the following qualifiers applies:

QUALIFIER #1: Don't root for a team that threatens YOUR team's legacy. Sorry, Pittsburgh (and my beloved Troy), but your "Stairway to Seven" season puts my 49ers in danger of falling TWO Super Bowl victories behind you guys for the all-time franchise lead. Plus, you have Ben Rothlisberger. No deal, Howie!

QUALIFIER #2: Jay Cutler is your quarterback. That guy sucks.

So, applying the above formula, I'll be rooting for the Green Bay Packers. Somebody break the news to Troy.

(I'm sure he's devastated).

Feedback

2011-01-17T18:43:00.001-08:00

Did you know "feedback" is the only word in the English language to use each of the first six letters of the alphabet (A-F)? Now that you know this, send me some!

Email: Bryan@BryanBishop.com

My old email also works: Bryan@HiBryan.com

I'm on Twitter, too. (I'm @BaldBryan)

How did BryanBishop.com come to be?

2011-01-05T21:19:00.000-08:00

It's kind of a funny story.

BryanBishop.com was once owned by another guy named - wait for it - BRYAN BISHOP! Bryan was (is?) a southern minister who used his site to help promote Bryan Bishop Ministries. The first time I looked up BryanBishop.com, I saw that he owned (and was using) the URL. Fair enough. I'd check back from time to time just to see if it was still active.

One day, I checked the site and found that it was no longer active. After a quick Google search, I found Bryan on MySpace. I emailed him, basically asking "Hey, if you're not using the domain, how 'bout I buy it off you?" His response: "I'm not really selling it, but everything's for sale nowadays, I guess. What's it worth to you?" I'll tell you what it WASN'T worth: a follow-up email. I let the whole thing go.

Then, last year, out of nowhere, a listener named Jason emailed me. He works in web marketing and specializes in watching and acquiring expired domain names. Apparently, BryanBishop.com had not been renewed by its owner and was coming up for auction. He didn't forsee the bidding getting too high (not sure how I feel about that), so he offered to get it for me - no strings attached.

Fast forward a couple of days: the auction happened, he got the domain, and handed it over to me. Just like that, BryanBishop.com was finally mine! It's hard to articulate, but there's a sense of... security?... in having "your" domain name.

The lesson here? Don't give your child a common name.